Warning, this post is PICTURE HEAVY!
I’ll justify that by calling it a “Tribute” to days forever gone. A chapter in my life that I loved. We all have those chapters don’t we? And the chapter I’m in now is pretty great too, but a chapter that will also end as they all do.
You can find A Love Story Parts I-VI HERE.
Now. Where were we? Oh yes, crying on a plane. I returned from NE still with no clear idea as to when Phil would just go ahead and make me his bride, so it was back to work and back to life as I knew it before Phil. We continued to write letters, talk on the phone and email each other.
Then something pretty great happened, I got laid off! A week after I was back to work I was out of a job. And I have to say I was so relieved. Terrible I know, but as I was signing papers and getting info on my severance package I was all smiles. I wasn’t the only employee let go that day, but I know I was the happiest.
About this time I got a second interview with a company I’d applied to work for. I knew looking for another J.O.B was absolutely NOT what I wanted to be doing. As I sat in that office waiting I felt a million miles away from Phil and all I DID want, but I told myself that if we did get married somewhere down the line, I needed to make some money now. So I went through with the interview.
It was also about this time that I realized that I was really beginning to feel something for Phil. I knew then that if all this went South I was gonna be in big trouble!
It probably sounds strange that even though I’d decided that I would marry Phil I still hadn’t totally had what you’d call “feelings”. I liked Phil a lot. I knew he’d be a good husband. I knew I wanted to be a wife. And I knew the “emotional” side of this would come someday. Well, it was coming!
I was in Limbo, get on with life in Austin or….or what? I was just waiting. And Phil was too, but he was also telling me to “trust him”. So I did. He told me not to worry about the money I thought I needed, so I didn’t.
I told the company I’d interviewed with to take my name off the table. It didn’t seem right for me to start a job only to have to quit within the year.
Phil told me, in so many words, that this limbo was the time I needed to enjoy my days in Austin…while they lasted.
So even though there was still no proposal, and no time line on how long I would be here, I knew it would all be changing very soon. I sensed that these day at HOME were coming to an end and I indeed needed to enjoy them while I could.
I began to make note of what “had been”. I began a kind of good-bye.
To favorite places.
Favorite friends.
To Starbucks…
And of course, to family.
As I contemplated all that I would lose if we married, I also began to list all that I would gain by marrying Phil. Both long lists! (I had no idea just how long the second list would become!)
Before I knew it I was having another birthday…a BIG ONE.
And for my birthday Phil bought me a plane ticket to come see him again. I had to wait until August, but I was thrilled!
At the end of July my rent was up and I didn’t renew my lease. I moved home. Phil LOVES to tell people I was 30, unemployed and living with my Mom when we got married! I was such a catch.
I got on with soaking up all the Austin, friends and family that I could.
Oh and yes, I was still a Rock Star!
This was such an odd time for me. Caught between two worlds. Feeling like I didn’t really belong in this one any more.
(My sweet handsome brothers!)
I knew I was ready for what was next…if that was Phil, but I knew leaving all this was going to be very hard.
On August 10th I flew back to NE.
My bestie Brenda, was expecting her first baby on the 11th. I wouldn’t be there for the birth. She told me that if I was going to miss one of the biggest days of her life that I’d better come back engaged!
Find out next time if I did….
Wonderful pictures of those last days in Austin! What you left behind for the most part is still here, what you gained is still growing! Love all these memories!