Also known as perfecting absurdity. In this house we witness endless ludicrousness. Having lots of little people around is the surest way to invite every kind of tomfoolery, from the chaotic to the comical. It’s typically non-stop cray in some form.
And now, living in a large city with more reasons to expose ourselves to the rest of humanity, I’m discovering another level of this life o’ shenanigans. When the privately preposterous becomes public. It’s a strange feeling of being somewhere between pride and absolute humiliation during minute of it.
Oh it feels so good when my little angels are sitting in a restaurant eating quietly or when they’re all walking together and holding hands. Be still my heart.
But it’s always there, in the back of my mama mind. This being in public with my babies becomes a delicate juggling act of too many balls. Or maybe I should describe it as the feeling of holding the thread of a rein on a herd of bulls? That thread’s gonna snap at any second.
Either way it usually feels a bit like a spectacle, going pretty well but all about to spin out of control.
It’s not exactly utter chaos as much as lots of little humans in their humaness happening in a small place that seems to make me feel so on display. To feel like all the eyes are wagging in my direction.
It’s just one ice cream upset, one smear of boogers, one blood curdling scream or just the huge bag I’m dragging around.
It’s one without underwear or one with only one shoe on. It’s the two that won’t stop cackling over something hilarious, one dropping her plate or one crying about something life or death.
These things happen right? But there’s something about it happening all at the same time, to so many kids that just makes the whole ordeal feel completely ridiculous.
When it happens at home you grit your teeth and roll with it. That’s just how it goes like it or not. But in front of the masses or where your neighbor can look over his fence and see it all going down? That’s rougher.
So if I could, I’d say to you other mamas who feel the eyes or get the smirks or who feel more like a 3 ring circus instead of a family of humans. I know.
I know it’s hard. I know there are times you just want to crawl under the nearest rock and wait it out. I know your kids aren’t always like that. I know there are some really great moments in your day. And I know there are days you think you’re gonna lose it. I know it’s kind of scary to be out here where we can see all that going on. I know you’re working on whatever it is that particular child keeps doing. I know you think you’re doing a bad job and I know sometimes you pat yourself on the back cuz they nailed it that time.
