"My beloved is unto me as a bundle of myrrh." Song of Solomon 1:13
Thursday, April 23rd, 2015
It’s that time again. Time to get back to life after extra help and a birth. My mama and aunt left yesterday. We forge our path into this adjustment phase of life. Figuring it out once more as we go. We’ve been here many times but it always takes a while to get back to normal, our new normal as they say.
Here we go!
Thursday, November 20th, 2014
I read this post yesterday and I agreed with what Bridget writes. It’s good to be reminded to blog with care and it made me think of all the reasons I blog as a mother, as a wife, as a woman.
So why do I blog?
Because I’m afraid I’ll forget.
Because I want to remember the great days.
I want to remember the bad days.
I want to remember that my babies make me laugh.
I want to remember that my babies make me cry.
I want to tell the world and my husband why I love him.
This blog is mostly for me. I know it’s public and I’m ok with that. I have no ambitions to expand, to have 100s of followers and 50 comments over how I put on my mascara or how cute my kids are at the park. They are really cute at the park by the way.
Friday, July 11th, 2014
All I wanted to do was sit down to check my Google Calendar to see what was for supper and like a moth to the flame they came. Needing, pushing, whining, wanting their jackets zipped, wanting to sit on my lap, crying because they “can’t see the puter”. Most days, well, everyday really, it’s hard to even sit down without a fight.
But some days I feel like “I got this.” The days are still hard. We may have left some phases behind, but there are new ones now. Ephraim has started biting, Gerhardt is way too aggressive for girls, Esther wants to help me with everything, Clara is in a very sassy phase and Lily, poor Lily just cries all day about anything she can find to cry about. The bickering escalates, there is still pee all over the floor and I shuffle from one fire to the next wondering how anything will get done, but at the end of the day lately, I’ve had that “I rocked this day” feeling.
It probably won’t last long and I think it’s only coming from the ridiculously low standards I’ve come to know so well, but this week we made play dough, we went to the park, we went to the library for a magic show and I look back not knowing how all that happened but really glad it did. The photos are from our 4th of July breakfast in the park, yet another gift of perfect weather and mostly happy babies. Even after the hour I spent driving back home to get bottles and formula I’d forgotten to bring for Mercy and missing the Fun Run…rookie mistake.
I look at each one of my babies and I’m overwhelmed with thankfulness. And that is a feeling I don’t have all the time. Under the work and chaos being thankful isn’t always my first thought, or second or third. But today, this week, it’s here. I’ve hugged more little bodies and kissed more cheeks than it seems like I have in a while.
These little steps toward whatever this is, are encouraging to me. After years of being in survival mode, I’m starting to feel a little…um, uncrushed.
I’m writing this down so I don’t forget that this is one more way our Heavenly Father provides for me, richly and daily all that I need to support this body and life, out of pure Fatherly divine goodness and mercy. Writing this down is an Ebenezer if you will. To remember that Goodness. Goodness that has been here all along, even when I felt it wasn’t.
“Then Samuel took a stone and set it between Mizpah and Shen, and named it Ebenezer, saying, “Thus far the Lord has helped us.” I Samuel 7:12
P to the S – If God ever gives us another boy I got dibs on the name Ebenezer. And every Christmas he’ll look at me with pain in his eyes…I know.
Friday, June 13th, 2014
*This is one of those “More for me than anyone else” posts. My blog helps me remember things that need remembering so if you snooze through this one come back another day, you’ll probably snooze again, but there could be better pictures.
I love vacations. I love being able to get away from normal and do something else even if for no other reason than to be able to look forward to getting back to normal again. We all need time to get away and relax, reboot, refresh.
But vacations with babies aren’t really those kinds of vacations. Vacations with babies is doing all the same stuff you do at home just with different scenery.
On vacations with babies a simple diaper change can become one of the most frustrating things you’ve ever done. You can’t just grab a pack of wipes out of the drawer you keep them in at home, you’ve got to remember which bag you packed them in, then hunt down that bag, hopefully it’s not the bag you left in the van, the van that’s locked, cuz then you got to go look for the husband who has the keys to unlock the van so you can find the bag that has the wipes in it.
